The Backside of Suffering

I'm borrowing the sermon title from our pastor in yesterday's service.
I've shared before that this blog/ministry is about obedience to Christ...answering the call He's clearly placed on my heart...but that desire to be obedient grows stronger every day and it's all due to the "backside of suffering".

Yesterday's sermon was all about finding the joy...not necessarily right in the midst of the pain.  No, not that you enjoy it -- no one does -- but that your faith reminds you that God NEVER wastes suffering and that He'll always turn it into good...not in our time, not in our way...but always in His and for His glory.

In my case it was easily 7 years or so before I could REALLY embrace the backside of my suffering...before I had even the slightest glimpse of how God had orchestrated something so amazing - FAR beyond anything I could have imagined - born out of my suffering.  (Read My Story of Brokenness to learn more)

And that was only the beginning.  I don't know all that God has in store for me or how He plans to continue using me, but I know that my mustard seed faith has been exposed in the last year.  At this time nearly a year ago -- my entire blog was lost.  My webpage went down and all the posts, all the time I had spent in prayer, pouring out my heart, trying to communicate to others that which I thought God wanted me to share...lost.  It seems like such a little inconvenience as I reflect upon it now -- but at the time -- it was a huge blow.  It was discouraging and frustrating, and made me question the point of trying to start over.

Right now, my care cell is studying "The Invisible War" and as we arm ourselves with the knowledge of the Devil and his schemes I can see the lies he planted in my head..."no one reads the blog", "there's plenty of other ministries and blogs for people to read", "people won't notice that you've stopped posting", "you'll never recover all the posts you lost"...slowly I let satan shift my focus to this being about me...my thoughts...my time...my posts...my ministry...

But that was never the point of any of this.  It's always been about God, the opportunity to give Him ALL the glory for the things He's done in my life, or should I say the JOY I've experienced on the backside of my own suffering :)

With as much conviction as ever -- I will press on -- I will run the race set out before me -- and I will consider it all JOY the pain, the heartache, the suffering, the challenges, may it all be to His glory.

At the end of yesterday's powerful sermon I shared the song "Blessings" by Laura Story.  For you who are in the midst of pain right now and need to hear this song, may it indeed be a Blessing to you.  For those of you who are also on the backside of suffering, but need a reminder of how God is using and plans to use that suffering to grow you closer to Him...may it be the peace you need right now.  For those of you who have heard it several times but have someone in your life that needs to hear this, may it be the encouragement you can share with them.

For a link to the lyrics of this beautiful and powerful song:  http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/laurastory/blessings.html

Tired of Fighting?

Originally posted on Tuesday, October 25th, 2011

Life’s battles…that is. Sunday’s sermon was a great reminder to me — the kind you can’t ever seem to get enough — that the wars of this world are not ours. The battle has already been won. Jesus said, “It is finished!”…yet we try in our might, and strength to win these earthy battles.  While I know my default should always be set on going to God…instead I often catch myself trying to take over, take control, steer the ship, run the show, and so forth. I fret, worry, stress, plan, overplan, question my planning, delegate, but then take over so it’s done right — does this sound familiar to anyone? Or is it just me?


While I can delight in the reminder that He’s already victorious…it stirred in me discomfort as I thought about those in my own sphere who fight their battles alone, by themselves, everyday unaware that God has offered to give them rest, to take their burdens in exchange for His yoke which is light. Maybe they believe there is a God but have no understanding of turning their life over to Him — or feel they aren’t “good” enough for God to accept or love them. Maybe that’s you today…weary from fighting your own battles…alone, weak, fragile, searching, broken, discouraged, hopeless.

The song I’m sharing today is an easy one for me to love because I’m a HUGE Natalie Grant fan. I’m drawn to her voice and her songs naturally so I often find myself humming along without actually letting the lyrics “sink in”. As I was thinking about this post and Sunday’s sermon, this song came on. Take a listen…you might first wonder what the connection is. The song is called, “Your Great Name”. But as I’m thinking about how victorious God is and the price He paid to win the war…these lyrics struck me.  SOOO victorious is He that the lost are saved, the condemned feel no shame, every fear leaves, the enemy flees – at the sound of His great name. So victorious is He that the weak find their strength, hungry souls receive grace, the fatherless find rest, the sick are healed, the dead are raised…at the sound of His great name.  When we think of God’s power in relation to our own — how silly is it that we keep fighting when He’s told us that all we have to do is take up our cross and follow Him?

Enjoy this song - particularly from a new perspective today.

Growing Pains

Originally posted on September 21st, 2011

Is God growing you right now? How is He doing it? Why is He so committed to growing us? What’s the point if I’m already saved…already a believer? Why does “growing” have to hurt this bad!?
I could go on but you get the idea…

I’m sharing an excerpt I found on the web at www.learnaboutgod.net — I found it appropriate for what God has laid on my heart.
The question for us is always, “Where are we growing?” Are we satisfied with a being a pine cone when God has in His purposes for us a full-grown pine tree that produces many pine cones, and provides shelter for many birds as well? It’s easier to be and remain a pinecone, but our God is life and life goes forward and grows. Another important consideration is that the more we allow God to do in our lives, the more He will be in our lives, and we are more likely to know Him. Knowing Him in turn causes further growth.

Preceding the excerpt, that last question may not have made since to some of you. Perhaps you haven’t experienced spiritual growth as pain yet — but likely — you will.  I look back to the very most painful times in life…the days when I didn’t want to live anymore…the devastation I felt and only now with a different perspective some 10+ years later can I also see the growth that came from that time along with the testimony, the depth of faith, the humbleness, the heart to reach out to others, and the understanding of how God will work all things to good for those who love the Lord.

Often growth hurts because it usually takes us OUT of our comfort zone. Oh No! Immediately my blood pressure goes up. If I’m going to be out of my comfort zone I better at least be able to touch it — right? Isn’t that how most of us are? When are we most comfortable? Well…usually when we’re “in control”. And finally — how often are the things that HURT (which are usually the same that help us GROW) out of our control?

I believe that God takes us out of our comfort zone because we’re then forced to wholly surrender. We’re never in control but we often convince ourselves we are and when we realize we’re definitely not…where and to whom do we turn? Who do we cry out to when we fall flat on our face? And then the healing (i.e. growing begins) :) When we are broken down, when we are nothing but rubble, when we are 100% surrendered — WOW there is some real room for growth there!

When you’re out of your comfort zone, when it hurts a little (or a LOT) you can know that God will use it to do the most amazing things in your life…for God has chosen to reveal His glory THROUGH us!?

The Sting of Death...

Originally posted on Aug 10, 2011

Finding it awfully difficult today to blog about something encouraging when I’ve just left a funeral for a 14 yr. old. Twice in the last few months I’ve watched a mom bury her child and in both cases — that mom was such a pillar of strength. It’s something to see really — to witness such poise, beauty, grace, and strength — could it be explained by anything other than God himself holding them up in this painful time?
I’m not a mother so I can’t imagine how hard it is to accept the reality that God gifts parents with children — but they are HIS, not ours…that He simply entrusts them with us for a time, for a season…

I have to believe that when a child goes to be with the Lord, a piece of their parents’ heart goes with them. Yes there is healing in time, and yes there is still the gift of the memories, the time we had with them, the pictures, the love but there must also be an ache and a void…to be filled when they reunite in heaven someday.

The pastor at today’s service talked about how it always seems much too soon when it’s a child that is taken from us…their life seems WAY too short — but then I was reminded that really ALL of our lives here on earth are but a blink of God’s eye just one chapter…preparing us for an eternity which we cannot fathom.
I want to share the verse that was referred to during the service and printed on the bulletins etc — I think certainly applies to the pain and sting of death…but isn’t it also true about many challenges in life? If you don’t have a “favorite” verse to help you face the battles of this life…maybe this is the one for you!

2 Corinthians 4:8-9
We are pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted but not forsaken; struck down but not destroyed.

In Christ,
Lenay

In Spite of Our Brokenness...There Is Freedom!

Originally posted on 8/03/20122

I LOVE it when a song gets stuck in my head (well…usually)
I LOVE it when worship songs get stuck in my head because it keeps my thoughts in a holy place. A song that’s been on my mind for a week now is called Freedom Reigns. I’ll put a link at the bottom of the post if you want to listen…but here are a few lyric snippets that I’ve been enjoying these last several days.
Where the spirit of the Lord is…there is freedom.

Now if you’re already a Christian, then you know this — but how often do we “REVEL” in it?! The single word freedom means sooo many things. Obviously freedom from the one thing we truly deserve which is hell, but freedom from so much more! Freedom from worrying, freedom from having to be perfect, freedom from this world, freedom from hopelessness, freedom from fear, freedom from addiction, freedom from our sin, freedom from our past, freedom from our mistakes, freedom from shame I could go on and on — but when you stop and think about it…WOW!

Yet, so often — we let the addiction, the shame, or the material things of this life have power over us and control us. So I just love the lyrics in this one simple line of the song…because it reminds me that the freedom comes WITH the spirit of the LORD (where the spirit of the Lord is)…and not apart from it!

Later in the song it says:
If you’re tired and your thirsty…there is freedom.
How often do we let ourselves get run down, tired, overworked, overextended and just keep trying to trudge along by ourselves…growing more empty by the day? We all get tired and thirsty — and I’m so thankful that He offers us the reprieve and the freedom. That He meets our every need, quenches our thirst etc.
Soak up the freedom!

Click here to enjoy this song!

Blessed By Abundance

Originally posted on July 16, 2011

I’m blogging this morning to avoid heading for my garden where I know there will be even MORE zucchini and yellow squash waiting for me and I’m already overwhelmed! I feel like I’ve frozen enough to get us through every week this winter and my arms cramp when I try to grate anymore!!! If you aren’t in KS and haven’t seen the map — it’s sweltering HOT here so turning on my oven to bake zucchini bread, muffins, or cake does not appeal to me either.

But…the reality as I thought about my garden for a bit this morning was how much it’s like my life. The truth is — I’m going to be THRILLED this winter when all those vegetables are an arm’s length away in my freezer. It’s truly a blessing to have so much being provided through the garden — like God’s love, His grace, His mercy, His forgiveness! All…seemingly endless (like my squash and tomato supply at the moment). Even when we don’t think we deserve it, or don’t understand why God sacrificed His own son on our behalf (or when I wonder why I planted so many zucchini plants)…still the gift keeps on giving and we’re blessed none-the-less.

So true is it also that my garden is rapidly producing weeds as well. Just as many, if not more, bad stuff grows in my garden as good stuff and I can go out planning to just one tiny section and spend hours trying to stay caught up with the weeding. But do I do that in my own life? Do I spend hours trying to cultivate only the good and tending to my heart to make sure the bad is weeded out?

I have resolved to be even more thankful for my garden despite being overwhelmed and count it all a blessing just as I’m overwhelmed by God’s grace, mercy, and love. But too — I know I need to spend more time “weeding” my heart of selfishness, pride, impatience and other such nasty weeds that threaten to take over if I’m not careful.

Heavenly Father — I thank you for the abundance of blessings in my life. I give you glory, honor, and praise for the work you’ve done in and through me. I’m overwhelmed by your endless love. Lord help me to weed my heart of the ugliness that exists. Lord help to walk in your ways. Amen 

One of Those Days?

Originally posted on July 14, 2011

Ugghhh — we all have them. The “could one more thing possibly go wrong today?” days…or even just the ho-hum days where you couldn’t buy motivation if a salesman brought it to your door. I have them too. But how we handle or react to those days is still a chance to bring glory to God.

If you’re having the awful, no-good, terrible really bad day type…are you snapping at those around you, taking it out on your kids, your co-workers or your spouse? Its really easy to do that but days like this are a good opportunity to re-focus and put things in perspective. I love Francesca Batestelli’s song: This is the Stuff — particularly the line that says, “in the middle of my little mess, I forget how big I’m blessed” Isn’t that the truth!?

So I encourage you to take a moment to stop and pray next time you’re having a “why me?” moment…or a “why can’t something go my way?” day! Ask God to help remind you of just how blessed you are — and then commit to passing that on to someone. At the church my husband and I attend, our Pastor regularly reminds us that we’re blessed to be a blessing. So choose not to let the little things drag you down or make you unlovely towards others. Choose to be a blessing to someone else and see if that doesn’t turn your day around!

The same is true for those ho-hum days when you just don’t feel like doing ANYTHING, yet God wants us to be good stewards of our time. I find that when I simply take a moment to be thankful that have 2 legs, 2 arms, that I can see, and that I’ve been blessed with this wonderful home and acreage…it doesn’t long before I’m up and ready to get after it!

Enjoy Francesca’s song here — it’s a catchy little diddy that gets stuck in my head and I love that cause it totally changes my mood! Hope it does the same for you

~Lenay