Where Does My Help Come From

Quiet time with this Psalm (121) this morning is just what I needed to keep going today...

Ever feel overwhelmed?  I do...quite often actually.  I used to have panic attacks where I would completely shut down.  Chest hurts, sweaty, shaky hands, hard to breath, can't catch my breath, need to throw up, dizzy, room is shaky or spinning, voices/sounds are kind of distorted and distant...still need to throw up, still can't breathe kind of panic attacks.

Thankfully, God continues His work in me (and promises He'll be faithful to complete it too!)...and these episodes are far less common than they used to be.  I know as I continue to become less, so that He can become more...panic and anxiety continue to lose their grip on me.

Yet every once in a while, the devil succeeds in distracting me.  Satan takes great joy in rolling all my responsibilities and obligations, desires, expectations, one after another at my feet in an attempt to trip me up. Interestingly, I remain poised for the most part relying on my own strength and perseverance to jump each hurdle in my path staying very focused and encouraging myself as I go...when all of the sudden...the unexpected darts out, I close my eyes and duck...and then miss the next hurdle.  There I am...lying in a heap, scabbed, bruised, angry, discouraged, hurt, broken and usually crying. :)

That crafty devil...wise enough to know that when my focus is on Christ, he doesn't stand a chance, but if he can shift my focus onto myself, convincing me I'm strong enough to go it alone...and keep pouring on the pressure...I won't see it coming when a friend or family member says something hurtful, when misunderstandings happen at work, or when my spouse does something to make me feel rejected.

I think to myself, "How could they say something like that?" or "Why would they feel that way about me?", "What did I do to deserve that?"..."Don't they know what I'm dealing with?".  The answer is no, no they don't know, nor do I know what they're going through.  Did I stop for 1 second to think about the battles they might be fighting in their own life?  What have I done lately to reach out to them and love on them? (Probably nothing because I couldn't take my eyes off my own path and my own hurdles).  More important perhaps is, how will I respond?  Will I give up, will I quit, will I lash out in self defense, will I choose to become angry and bitter?  Probably so...UNLESS I lift my eyes upward and receive His strength and His help.  If I allow myself to stand and soak up the mercy and grace that He pours out upon me...and then give Him my burdens as He's asked me to...the result is...FREEDOM.  Freedom from the pressure, the stress, the anxiety, the worry, the hurt, etc.

After going through the Bible Study recently with my small group, "The Invisible War" -- I'm less ignorant to the devil's ways.  Yes we know that for those of us in Christ the battle has been won...but let us not think the devil doesn't continue to be a thorn in our side.  What does he love the most -- using us against each other! A hurtful word, unforgiveness harbored, thoughts of contempt when we don't agree on something, lukewarm commitment, selfishness, and the list goes on.

So this morning...God patiently reminded me ONCE AGAIN the He is my help, He is my strength and I pray this for each of you and the battles in your own lives.

¹  I lift up my eyes to the hills.

From where does my help come?

² My help comes from the Lord,

    who made heaven and earth.

³ He will not let your foot be moved;

    he who keeps you will not slumber.

⁴ Behold, he who keeps Israel

    will neither slumber nor sleep.

⁵ The Lord is your keeper;

    the Lord is your shade on your right hand.

⁶ The sun shall not strike you by day,

    nor the moon by night.

⁷ The Lord will keep you from all evil;

    he will keep your life.

⁸ The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in

    from this time forth and forevermore.

How do you choose joy?

No really...how do YOU choose J - O - Y?  :)

Recently, I was part of a group devotion on joy.  There was lots of talking about how joy is different than happiness...
Joy is deeper than happiness, more abundant than pleasures, more exciting than thrills, and richer than excitement...it's long-lasting, never-failing, deeply rooted in our hearts and where there is joy...there is also peace.  (As someone who is anxiety prone, just typing and reading the word peace...makes the tightness in my chest subside...just a little...for just a moment. ;) )

Joy is a condition and attitude of the heart...it's much more than a feeling which is fleeting, flaky, unreliable, and non-committal (feelings come and go).

Where does this unending, unshakable supply of joy come from?  All that comes to mind is that childhood song, "I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart", "where?", "down in my heart to stay!"

I confess, I have a lot of work to do before I could say that I am a habitual chooser of joy.  But I know that continually pursuing Christ and surrendering my burdens and worries to him is the only way.  Further it's easy enough to be joyful during the happy, trial-free chapters of life...but it takes a great deal more faith to trust Him during the difficult and dark times...when you feel all alone...like God is silent, distant, or doesn't care.

Choosing joy may simply come down to where your focus lies.  Are you focused on you, what you should get, didn't get, want to have, "need" to experience, desire for yourself or your family...?  Or is your focus on Christ --  His holiness, His power, His grace, His ability to do immeasureably more than we could ask for or imagine...?  It's probably safe for me to say (about myself) that selfishness is what gets in the way of my joy more often than not.

I don't see myself ever getting a tattoo...I suppose I feel a little like God already gave me all the permanent marks he wants me to have on my body...but the bigger issue is probably that I have a hard time thinking of something I would want for-EVER nor can I identify a part of my body that I want altered for-EVER.  That said -- I did come across this tattoo and found it both neat and appropriate for today's blog :)



Recently, I've begun setting aside larger chunks of time for intentional prayer each morning and instead of presenting my grocery list of requests for God...I've shifted my focus to prayers of thanks for all I am blessed with and all He has given me.  It's a special time each day now to just sit in His presence and soak up the abundance in my life...

So back to my question for this blog post - how do YOU choose joy?  :)

Habakkuk 3:18   I will take joy in the God of my salvation

"Vulgarity is no substitute for Wit"

The above quote by Julian Fellowes makes a great point:
"Vulgarity is no substitute for wit" is true!

You who are parents know how quickly your children pick up on what they hear...and repeat it.  Lately we've been working with the man who is now living with us on this very thing.  He's known no different for decades, but the other day after hearing him let out a string of unnecessary language (mostly to himself and somewhat under his breath) I teasingly suggested he "cast his potty mouth out into the lake next time he goes fishing".

This has opened the door for a couple follow up discussions regarding the way we talk and has given my husband and I a chance to share with him that what comes out of his mouth -- is a reflection of what's in his heart.

I came across this blog posting and wanted to share -- it hits on some of the very things we've been discussing at our house.  Language and what language we tolerate is just one more thing that I feel Christians are becoming complacent about.  It seems like many have adopted the "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" mentality which saddens me.

Disclaimer:  In no way is this blog post meant to imply that I've never had a slip of the tongue or don't ever say things I shouldn't but I think it's important to reflect on the reality behind trying to eliminate those from our lives.

This is a quick read -- but great if you're one who needs to push the "reset" button for your brain, and mouth :)

Original author is noted below.

Why I Don’t Use the F-Word

8:28AM EDT 7/31/2013 J. LEE GRADY

 

I honestly never thought I’d see the day when Christians would justify swearing.

I lived a sheltered life growing up. My Christian parents allowed me to watch a re-release of Gone With the Wind at the local theater when I was 12, and my virgin ears were scandalized when Rhett Butler told Scarlett, “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.” I had never heard such language—and I knew that if I ever talked like Rhett Butler in my house, I would be sent to the backyard to choose my own switch.

Fast-forward to today, when profanity has so saturated our culture that dirty words are unavoidable. Dropping the F-bomb is a daily habit for millions of Americans. Jesse Sheidlower, the editor-at-large of the Oxford English Dictionary, says the F-word has lost its shock value. He says, “For most people, it’s hardly noticeable anymore.”

Today students wear “WTF?” T-shirts to school. I’ve seen the F-word indelibly tattooed on people’s arms in dark blue ink. And I’ve heard guys and girls alike use the F-word more than 15 times in a sentence to simply describe their day. There’s even a mock children’s book titled Go the F*** to Sleep that was one of the fastest-selling titles on Amazon in 2011. What’s going on here?

Music has certainly played a role in forcing the F-word on us. (Listen if you dare to any popular hip-hop artist for proof of this nastiness.) One song by the rock band Limp Bizkit a few years ago featured the F-word 50 times. American rapper CeeLo Green released a song in 2010 called F*** You, and it was nominated for a Grammy Award. Meanwhile, the Motion Picture Association of America recently relaxed its ratings code to allow more uses of the F-word in PG-13 movies. (The old rule only allowed one F-bomb per film.)

I’m not going on a crusade to wash out our nation’s potty mouth. We live in a free country. And besides, I don’t expect non-Christians to talk like Sunday school teachers. But at the risk of sounding like a prude, I think true believers need to be reminded that it’s not okay to talk trash. This certainly goes for preachers—no matter how young and trendy they are.

I honestly never thought I’d see the day when Christians would justify swearing. But it was only inevitable, since many popular preachers have emphasized greasy grace while overlooking our serious lack of discipleship. The underlying message these days is: “Don’t be religious or legalistic. We have to be relevant to the culture.” The implied meaning is: “Go ahead and talk dirty. God doesn’t care. Maybe when non-Christians hear you swearing, they won’t label you a religious nut.” I’m not buying that line for three reasons:

1. Filthy talk defiles you and those around you. Jesus said it is not what goes into the mouth of a person that defiles him, but what comes out of his mouth (Matt. 15:11). Then the apostle Paul wrote, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths” (Eph. 4:29, ESV). The word corrupting here refers to rotten fruit or rancid fish. Filthy talk stinks! Dirty words have the power to soil you—and the rancid odor will linger in your soul.

2. Obscene or crude language is a reflection of your inner character. British preacher Charles Spurgeon once said, “Beware of everyone who swears: he who would blaspheme his Maker would make no bones of lying or stealing.” Ephesians 5:4 says filthy talk or crude joking are not “befitting” a Christian (ASV). The NIV translates it this way: “Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place.” If a Christian defiantly insists on talking trash, he has revealed deeper flaws and can’t be trusted.

3. Rough language is a sign of an unsurrendered will. The psalmist wrote, “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!” (Ps. 141:3, ESV). Mature Christians invite the Holy Spirit to inspect every area of their lives: attitudes, thoughts, grudges and addictions—as well as coarse language. If you insist on holding on to carnal habits, you are quenching the Spirit’s fire. Your spiritual growth will be forever stunted.

The prophet Isaiah recognized that he was “a man of unclean lips” who lived among “a people of unclean lips” (Is. 6:5). After his repentance, an angel touched his lips with the hot coal of God’s holiness. We need this miracle today if we want to speak for God.

God wants to use our mouths as channels of His life and blessing, but we will never be His prophets if we talk like the world. Let God clean up your conversation.

Mom's, soon to be mom's -- just for you! :)

I'm reposting this from a blog called Short Stop.
It's not a blog I follow -- just a post shared on Facebook by a friend...I read it...and knew I should share it with others.

Maybe just because I'm getting a teeny tiny taste of motherhood with our new family member living with us.  How you spend your time, how you plan meals, and buy groceries, and new errands to run, and less alone time with your spouse...these are things I'm adjusting to right now.  I know it's NOT the same as parenting but it's helped me have more sympathy for you who are mom's right now :)

Anyway -- less from me -- and more from this lady.  I hope you find yourselves encouraged.

To Moms of One or Two Childrenby Sarah Short

How do you do it? 

I've never counted, but I imagine the number of times I've been asked that question by Moms with one or two children is somewhere in the hundreds. I have five children, and judging by the look on the tired and weary faces that pose the question, that number seems simply impossible.

How do you do it? 

Those are five loaded words. I suppose because the "it" behind that question is different for everyone. 

• How do you care for five little people? 
• How do you operate on little sleep? 
• How do you keep them safe? 
• How do you find time to do the laundry? 
• How do you afford them? 
• How do you keep from losing your ever-loving mind? 

Mommas of one and two children - I understand every one of these questions. And, I understand just where you're coming from.

There are some things I want you to know about me. About children. About this journey through motherhood that we're both on.

If no one has ever told you... 

1. You are maxed out - emotionally and physically - at the number of children you currently have. When I had my two-month old baby Jack, I sat on the edge of my bed and cried like a toddler who dropped her brand new ice cream cone because I thought my life was over. O-VER! This baby child, my supposed dream come true, wanted to wake up in the middle of the night and feed off of me, and all I wanted was to sleep. Baby "Not What I'd Read" would sleep, sleep, sleep all morning while I did dishes and caught up on laundry, but NOOOOOOO way I was gettin' a nap in the afternoon when all of that was finished.

The first time I went to Target with him, I took so much gear with me (I took my Boppy, people), that after I loaded up the cart with him and my gear, I couldn't buy anything because nothing fit.

I was completely overwhelmed. And, then he grew into a mobile baby and I thought it would be a good idea to get pregnant again so that while he was ripping everything out of the cabinets, bleeding from the mouth from playing bumper cars with the coffee table, eating the sofa, crawling the stairs to plummet to his demise, and licking the electrical outlets, I could also be barfing.

And, he still didn't sleep.

And, then his brother arrived. Eighteen months after he was born. And, I had no idea how people could possibly care for two children. Who are these LUNATICS who have a ton of children? How on earth am I supposed to nurse a newborn, and keep my maniac toddler from imminent death?

I was maxed out. It was one of the hardest times of my life - caring for one and then eighteen months later, two of them.

Moms of one and two children - You are doing HARD work. It is overwhelming and completely exhausting and figuring it all out is some of the most physically, mentally, emotionally, and heart-wrenching work you will ever do. I know you are maxed out - in every way. And, I tell you this, not as someone who is patting you on the back and looking at you with condescending pity, but as someone who KNOWS how hard you are working and how taxing this season is on you. But, there is hope. It does get easier. Not because a light bulb goes off one day and you figure it all out.

But, because...

2. You will find your way. Your way. Not your Mom's way. Not Granny's way. Not pushy Aunt Bertie's way.

Your way.

What worked for your mom, Granny, and Aunt Bertie may simply not work for you. I LOVE hearing the wisdom and experiences from the older women in my life, but I HAVE to sift through their advice and experiences and choices to find what really helps me and what doesn't. Not only are children all different, but mothers are different. We tick and tock to different beats - some of us slower and some on hyperspeed, some on schedules and some just wingin' it. (I'm the latter, Lord help me.) As you get to know your children and build your home life, you will find what works for you. You will. And, letting go of the expectations of others is a BIG part of that. Pull what works for you. Respectfully let go of the rest.

This applies to friendships as well. Do you know who my best friends are? The ones that I lean on and trust and cry to and share with? They are my friends who insist, along with me, that there is no one way to do something. I have a very difficult time developing and maintaining friendships with people who have found THE ONE AND ONLY WAY to do something.

"OMG, you gave him PEANUT BUTTER at TEN MONTHS?"
"You don't have a laundry day???"
"Three year-olds should never still be in diapers."

No. We cannot be friends. Not close friends. Not cry on your shoulder friends.

As you find your way, quick-steppin' to a groove with those babies dancin' along with you, I've got some really, really, really good news...

3. It gets easier. If you let God get bigger.

I now have five children. And, I'm maxed out. Totally maxed out. Just like I was when I had one. And two and three and four.

But, mothering is easier for me now than it used to be. For one reason:

I need God more.

I need Him in the morning. At noon. And at night. I need Him to wipe my tears when my baby won't let me sleep at night. I need Him to calm my heart when I'm changing bed sheets at 2am. I need Him to keep my children safe because I only have two hands and one set of eyes and crossing a parking lot means holding on tight but it also means letting go of "I can do this, I can do this" and trading it for "God, You are with me and You love them, too."

I need Him to help me trade my doing for His doing.

I need His patience.
I need His joy.
I need His love.

You know, I needed God when I had one and two children. But, I had all of this stuff - books and gear and Grannies and know-it-all voices and I had me.

So I flailed about amidst all of that and tried to raise my children in the Land of I Can Do This.

But, God has whittled away all of that other stuff. He's taught me that He loves my children more than I do, and He loves to hear my voice calling out to Him and letting Him fill me with strength and wisdom and love and joy for my children. I don't have it. But, He does.

So, Mommas of one or two littles afoot - when you ask me, "How do you do it?" - I know what you're asking. And, I know what you're feeling and what's behind your eyes and I walked in your shoes and you are doing the HARD, HARD stuff of motherhood.

It is not easier because you "only" have one child. Or two children.

But, as you find your way, and the more you let God be your strength and realize that you cannot in the many ways you think you can, it gets easier.

And, it gets so, so good.

Learning To Be The Light

Matthew 5:14-16 
“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.

Many of us our familiar with the references to God's truth and His word being the light...and therefore if we are in Him, then we are also the light of the world.  The word light, and the imagery of it (Christ's light in me and being light to a dark world) always brings about warm/fuzzy feelings for me. :)

But what if being the light is more than just feeling good because I have God in me? What if it's more than just being kind to most people most days...?

My husband and I have been blessed recently with an opportunity each day to BE the light instead of just acting like the light.  What is the difference?  Well for me...the realization came when some full time missionaries from our church were back visiting this past Sunday and they shared that exact challenge...

How do we move away from acting like the light - to actually being the light?

It's fairly easy to "act" like the light -- say an encouraging and uplifting thing or two -- offer to pray for someone (which we may or may not remember to do) -- comments such as "sometime let's....." or "if you need anything at all...let me know" -- remaining patient and pleasant with most everyone we encounter during the day -- maybe even sharing food or money with a homeless person.  Don't get me wrong...these things aren't bad, they're good, and they're wonderful "flickers" of light to those who receive them.  Most of us have the best of intentions and mean well in all of the above.  But BEING the light takes a great deal more commitment and sacrifice...as we're finding out...
BEING the light involves immersing yourself.

If a light flickers briefly in a dark room, or if someone with a flashlight walks in for a few moments but ultimately leaves...the room is still dark, there may have been a glimmer of light, but nothing lasting.

In our current situation, God has put it on our heart to open our home and acreage to a man with very little.
By very little I don't just mean money although that is true in this case, but also very little joy/happiness in his life, very little family, very little ability/understanding, very little support from friends, very little acceptance from society, very little peace, very little knowledge of God/God's love for him...you get the idea.

BEING the light to this man has stretched us tremendously already.  Prior to this past month, as a result of the curriculum "Radical" that we're going through in Sunday School...I've often thought "what does this look like for us God?"  "What would you have us do to radically glorify you?"  Not all of us are called to full time missionary work...that is true...so what can we (Justin and I) do then?  It is true if you listen when God prompts, and if you're patient for Him to show you His doors of opportunity instead of barging through your own plans, agendas, routines, etc. -- He'll use you for something beautiful!

We're learning as much from our new friend as he is from us.  God is using this situation to teach me a great deal of patience, and to show me what a servant's heart REALLY looks like.  Evenings are about helping him complete whatever project he started that day; cooking only meals soft enough for someone with no teeth to eat; giving up couple time on the couch to go fishing; spending time helping him understand that God's forgiveness is greater than anything in his past; learning to share my space and give up our privacy; seeing firsthand that more than 3 changes of clothes and showers with indoor plumbing instead of a garden hose aren't necessities...they're merely luxuries.

My morning prayer time now consists of fervently praying for the patience needed that day, for fewer selfish tendencies in my heart, and that God might supply the right verse, and the right truth at the right time for us to share and discuss.  The minute I feel tired or drained from serving in this way -- I know immediately that I'm doing it in my own strength instead of relying on God's.

Is there a point to today's post?  I'm not sure! :)  I know God has made his point in my own heart...and I pray more of us will see opportunities to BE the light.  I've posted this song before but I'll share again as it's the tune that's humming in my own heart right now.

LEARNIN' TO BE THE LIGHT

An Attitude Adjustment

I'll admit...the poem I'm sharing today is actually meant for mom's.  For those of you that truly know the challenge of housekeeping AND child rearing. It seems like a married women with no children should have ZERO trouble keeping her house clean.  Sigh...I wish that were true.  We live on a dirt road in the country and raise goats.  This farm life keeps mud and dirt coming in my house at ALL times.

Recently I found myself overwhelmed quite regularly...always feeling like the WHOLE house needs clean and I never have a chunk of time big enough to do the WHOLE house.  This only gets worse when the summer produce is spilling out of my garden and my counter which is inevitably dirty is now also buried in produce.  (the produce should be a blessing...but often it causes a great deal of stress as there is limited time to put up the abundance before it spoils)

Anyway -- I've been working hard lately to pick one household cleaning chore a day (i.e. dusting, vacuuming, the kitchen, the bathrooms) and working to maintain something that vaguely resembles cleanliness on a continual basis rather than striving for an entire day with no commitments in which I can tackle the house in it's entirety...which...in the end...only stays spotless until the next time we do chores. :)

This poem reminded me that it's all about perspective and attitude...these things I call "chores" are really blessings.  How lucky am I to have a husband with laundry to do...and animals that I adore (who happen to be dirty)...and rain to grow my garden (which results in mud)...and a beautiful view (which happens to be at the end of a dirt road).  I felt others of us struggling to maintain balance and sanity at times might also need this reminder.

Thank You

Dear Lord, Your Word says ‘don’t complain; I know that this is true.
But when it comes to housework or chores I don’t want to do,
It’s easy to resent the things to which I must give time.
“Taking up my cross” isn’t always what I have in mind.

But Lord, You have been teaching me to see the way You see,
To realize that household tasks are blessings You gave me.
And so, I choose to give You thanks for all I have to do,
Knowing that the privilege of doing it’s from You.

Thank You for the laundry dropped in piles upon the floor,
And for the dirty pairs of shoes left right inside the door.
Thank You for the shirts and socks and coats flung everywhere,
For OxiClean and Shout and Tide—it means we’ve clothes to wear.

Dirty cups and dishes clutter countertops and sink.
I sure hope no one’s hungry; I hope no one needs a drink.
If it could all just wash itself, it would be such a treat.
But thanks for dirty dishes, too—it means we’ve food to eat.

Thank You for the sink and floor and toilet I must scrub.
Thank You for the shower; thank You for the tub.
Thank You for the mirror and wet towels I know are coming.
Thank You for this bathroom; it means we’ve indoor plumbing.

The messiness of games and toys and books covers our floors.
And did I mention dolls and blocks and drawings taped on doors?
Sometimes, I think I’ve seen my fill of Hot Wheels, Legos, bibs.
But thank You for this chaos—it means I have four kids.

My front yard isn’t landscaped. It isn’t even mown.
It’s filled with plastic toys and shovels—things that aren’t my own.
It sure won’t win “Yard of the Month”, but I don’t need that anyway.
I thank You for my lived-in yard—my kids have space to play.

There’s so much work I must get done. I do it all, and then
An hour later, it’s a mess, and must be done again.
But Lord, I thank You for the time that I can’t call my own,
The time spent serving others. It means I have a home.

Oh, forgive me, Lord, for asking You for blessings great and small,
Then complaining when I have to clean or take care of them all.
Oh, Lord, the very fact that I always have much to do
Is not a cause for bitterness, but for giving thanks to You.

I see now that every chore I have to do reflects Your grace
In blessing me with earthly things until I see Your face.
May I do my work with gratitude for the opportunity,
Seeing in it a chance for joy, and not mere drudgery.

My heart responds in thankfulness for all that You have given.
I’ll serve You by taking care of it ’til You call me to heaven.
And may I serve in such a way that the world sees Your dear Son
In my heart and hands and words and work, that to Him, they be won.

Stumbling Into Refreshment

We whistle at our kids and pets to get their attention, teachers might clap their hands to call attention to the front of the room, sirens get our intention in times of emergency, timers and buzzes on our ovens alert us to when food is ready...all examples of how easy it is for us to get a little caught up in ourselves and our own little world, until something catches our attention.  In fact -- I'm the queen of busy and I rely on all kinds of alarms and attention getters every day to remind myself what I need to be focusing on at that given moment.

All too often -- this business has us going, going, going with little focus on God.  At times it's a little stumble that draws our focus back to God.  I've come to appreciate these chances to slow down, check my heart, and spend some time with God.  Kind of like restarting our computers after an update.

I had a little stumble yesterday when a new friend said some harsh and inaccurate things about me...and it stung just a bit.  In fact it ruled over my thoughts most of the day yesterday.  I didn't understand why anyone could think or would say such things about me.  In the end it's a total misunderstanding and mostly due to the fact that this person doesn't know me very well yet.  Still...why was I so caught off guard by it?

Do I think I'm perfect? No, I most certainly know that I'm not.  Do I think this person is perfect?  No, I know that isn't true either.  Should my faith be in man?  Absolutely not!  Time and time again, we put faith in man and are disappointed.

God word tells us in Psalm 118:8
It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.

Now can we really go about our lives NOT trusting ANYONE?  No, that's not realistic.  We trust others everyday.  We trust caregivers to watch over our children, we trust bus drivers and pilots to get us safely to our destination, restaurant workers to prepare and handle our food safely, we trust the bank to accurately deposit our paychecks etc.    The point isn't to stop trusting others but it is to remind us in WHOM our ultimate trust should lie.  And not to despair when we have a little stumble.  All of us need a little reminder now and then to shift our focus back on Christ and to rely on him alone.
Do the words about me yesterday still sting?  Yes, but I know that God knows my heart and that little stumble yesterday resulted in some refreshing time spent with God last night and this morning taking time out from my "busy work" to soak up His truths and His promises.  I hope these little hiccups in your life might do the same for you.

Here is a song I sang on Sunday with one of our team members.  We were both a little surprised to hear the congregation singing with us right from the beginning...which says to me...we know these words to be TRUE indeed:
Lord I need you oh I need you, every hour I need you.  My one defense my righteousness, oh God how I need you.

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The Backside of Suffering

I'm borrowing the sermon title from our pastor in yesterday's service.
I've shared before that this blog/ministry is about obedience to Christ...answering the call He's clearly placed on my heart...but that desire to be obedient grows stronger every day and it's all due to the "backside of suffering".

Yesterday's sermon was all about finding the joy...not necessarily right in the midst of the pain.  No, not that you enjoy it -- no one does -- but that your faith reminds you that God NEVER wastes suffering and that He'll always turn it into good...not in our time, not in our way...but always in His and for His glory.

In my case it was easily 7 years or so before I could REALLY embrace the backside of my suffering...before I had even the slightest glimpse of how God had orchestrated something so amazing - FAR beyond anything I could have imagined - born out of my suffering.  (Read My Story of Brokenness to learn more)

And that was only the beginning.  I don't know all that God has in store for me or how He plans to continue using me, but I know that my mustard seed faith has been exposed in the last year.  At this time nearly a year ago -- my entire blog was lost.  My webpage went down and all the posts, all the time I had spent in prayer, pouring out my heart, trying to communicate to others that which I thought God wanted me to share...lost.  It seems like such a little inconvenience as I reflect upon it now -- but at the time -- it was a huge blow.  It was discouraging and frustrating, and made me question the point of trying to start over.

Right now, my care cell is studying "The Invisible War" and as we arm ourselves with the knowledge of the Devil and his schemes I can see the lies he planted in my head..."no one reads the blog", "there's plenty of other ministries and blogs for people to read", "people won't notice that you've stopped posting", "you'll never recover all the posts you lost"...slowly I let satan shift my focus to this being about me...my thoughts...my time...my posts...my ministry...

But that was never the point of any of this.  It's always been about God, the opportunity to give Him ALL the glory for the things He's done in my life, or should I say the JOY I've experienced on the backside of my own suffering :)

With as much conviction as ever -- I will press on -- I will run the race set out before me -- and I will consider it all JOY the pain, the heartache, the suffering, the challenges, may it all be to His glory.

At the end of yesterday's powerful sermon I shared the song "Blessings" by Laura Story.  For you who are in the midst of pain right now and need to hear this song, may it indeed be a Blessing to you.  For those of you who are also on the backside of suffering, but need a reminder of how God is using and plans to use that suffering to grow you closer to Him...may it be the peace you need right now.  For those of you who have heard it several times but have someone in your life that needs to hear this, may it be the encouragement you can share with them.

For a link to the lyrics of this beautiful and powerful song:  http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/laurastory/blessings.html