14 Day Love Your Husband Challenge - Day 3

Want to know what your husband craves from you the way you crave his affection?  It's simple really...it's your undivided attention.  He wants to be your sole focus on a regular basis.  Ladies, I'll be honest, I can multi-task with the best of you...we are wired that way...to be thinking about several things at once.  It's no problem for me to have supper on the stove, be emptying the dishwasher, and talking to him about my day or asking him about his...I'm probably putting groceries away too...sound familiar?  I know I'm not alone here!

Our husbands however, are NOT wired that way.  Their brains work differently and are designed (by GOD) to focus on only 1 thing at at time.  That's where their attention is and that's what they're thinking about.  If you've never watched "The Tale of Two Brains" by Mark Gungor - do check it out.  He does a fabulous AND funny job of illustrating how differently our brains work!

When your husband is needing a connection with you and is trying to engage with you but you're checking your phone, going through the mail, and putting away laundry, he feels insignificant and unimportant.  He longs for you to be focused on him - and it doesn't have to be a HUGE chunk of time either.  Just make a point to let him know he matters most...more than dishes, laundry, and facebook.  Maybe this is time in the morning before the kids are up, or maybe it means a conscious committed routine that has them in bed at a regular time that is early enough for the 2 of you to have time together after they're down for the night.  Maybe you have regular lunch dates or if your husband travels then maybe it's phone time or facetime but EVEN then ladies...he can tell if you're doing 7 other things while you're talking to him. He doesn't want to feel like a nuisance or a distraction to you, he wants to feel like your other half.

Today's challenge is to give him that 10-20 minutes daily to reassure him that he has your heart!  It's going to take practice and discipline but starting today, work on making sure that you're listening to what he's saying, and thinking about only that...only him and what he's talking about (side note: he doesn't need you to fix anything, he literally JUST needs your attention).  Some men don't walk through the door ready to spill the beans about their day and give you all the details...you may have to be interested enough in him to ask questions.  That said,,,there may be days when he doesn't feel like talking but you can give him your attention and your sole focus other ways.  For example, my husband shaves his head bald and he LOVES it when I tickle his head and neck, so I could simply sit next to him, tickle his head and tell him about my day.

Sounds simple enough right?  But for most of us, our default mode is the opposite of this.   Oprah said it well: