I had to break away from my "Beautiful Is..." series to address this timely topic, but stay tuned...we'll get back on track!
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5 Reasons to Stay Away |
1. It's not just innocent fun with girlfriends...but that IS the lie that Satan would have you believe!
We women are emotional creatures and we can store memories like a steel trap. Our memories are tied to emotions and once our eyes have seen and ears have heard...we can't unsee or unhear. Each time we replay the scenes in our head, we'll continue to relive the emotions tied to them. It's not long before our own real life experiences with our spouse become bland and emotionless in comparison.
2. This isn't the kind of submission that is beautiful...and it's not what God designed for us as women.
Submission has gotten such a bad rap in our society because the worldy view portrays women as some kind of weak victim that has no voice or thoughts or input...no contribution at all. That isn't an accurate portrayal of God's design at all, nor is the kind of submission in this movie, yet it's glamorized on a big movie screen so now it's seen as exciting and erotic. The submission that God calls on us for is out of love and respect for a man (our husband) who absolutely cherishes us, protects us, and enjoys us...a man who provides for us and dies to himself to put our needs first...a man who would never want to harm us. Violence is never sexy and this kind of submission is not either.
3. Porn is not the way to "spice" up your marriage, it is however, a great way to destroy a marriage. And yes, this is porn.
A bigger film budget and better actors does not change the fact that this is porn. Did you know that 56% of divorces point to porn addiction/obsession as a factor and that 88% of pornography shows some level of physical aggression towards women? Think watching it just once won't do any harm or have any lasting effects? Ask ANY addict (of ANY kind) if they thought anything bad would come from trying it "just once". And Eve thought one bite of that apple wouldn't be a big deal either...
You could do a whole lot more for your marriage and your sexual intimacy by simply being available to one another and being open about your needs...and THEN be more interested in meeting one another's needs than going to watch some degrading movie about a fictional person's needs.
A bigger film budget and better actors does not change the fact that this is porn. Did you know that 56% of divorces point to porn addiction/obsession as a factor and that 88% of pornography shows some level of physical aggression towards women? Think watching it just once won't do any harm or have any lasting effects? Ask ANY addict (of ANY kind) if they thought anything bad would come from trying it "just once". And Eve thought one bite of that apple wouldn't be a big deal either...
You could do a whole lot more for your marriage and your sexual intimacy by simply being available to one another and being open about your needs...and THEN be more interested in meeting one another's needs than going to watch some degrading movie about a fictional person's needs.
4. Lust isn't just a sin for husbands.
Because men are typically more sexually driven, society often thinks of them as the ones who struggle with lust. But here's the definition of lust: uncontrolled or illicit sexual desire or appetite; an overmastering desire or craving. Lust is just as crippling and unhealthy for women, and it has just as much power over us. The minute we entertain thoughts or fantasies of something more or different than our husband is...the door is open for us to check out and leave behind our realities. This is very dangerous because it doesn't take long before "real" can't measure up to the "fantasy".
Because men are typically more sexually driven, society often thinks of them as the ones who struggle with lust. But here's the definition of lust: uncontrolled or illicit sexual desire or appetite; an overmastering desire or craving. Lust is just as crippling and unhealthy for women, and it has just as much power over us. The minute we entertain thoughts or fantasies of something more or different than our husband is...the door is open for us to check out and leave behind our realities. This is very dangerous because it doesn't take long before "real" can't measure up to the "fantasy".
5. In real life - the 50 Shades of Grey relationships aren't erotic at all...
in fact they're dangerous at best and deadly at worst. Ask any victim of sex trafficking how erotic and arousing their experiences were. Let them describe what it's like to be dominated by a man sexually and how it feels when violence and pain are used. In real life the man that needs this kind of control sexually almost always needs it in other areas of his life as well, and all too often, someone's life is at stake when he doesn't have or can't maintain that control. Don't let the fact that it's Melanie Griffith's daughter and that the previews show a really luxurious teal blindfold cloud your perception of this film.
in fact they're dangerous at best and deadly at worst. Ask any victim of sex trafficking how erotic and arousing their experiences were. Let them describe what it's like to be dominated by a man sexually and how it feels when violence and pain are used. In real life the man that needs this kind of control sexually almost always needs it in other areas of his life as well, and all too often, someone's life is at stake when he doesn't have or can't maintain that control. Don't let the fact that it's Melanie Griffith's daughter and that the previews show a really luxurious teal blindfold cloud your perception of this film.
Do yourself, your husband, your marriage, and your bank account a favor by not going. Take a stand this weekend and share these truths with other women in your midst. Find Beautifully Broken on Facebook and stay tuned for a 14 day "Love Your Husband" challenge kicking off on February 14.
1 Corinthians 6:18-20
18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
19 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
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